Nigeria next First Lady: Weighing our options

Neither Nigeria First Lady Madam Patience Goodluck nor Mrs Aisha Buhari will be elected,  yet, one of them will have enormous power to make positive change in the country especially amongst women.

We have seen pretty much what Madam P is capable of for the last eight years in Aso Rock, most notably for the last four years. Madam P as I see it is very energetic lady who could have done a lot better given the opportunity thrown at her, instead she played the stereotypical role that Nigeria women only concerns was for their bling bling – this is noticeable in many overseas trips in the name of claiming women rights aka National Council of Women’s Societies (NCWS) and of course First Lady’s attitude towards the mothers of kidnapped Chibok girls was to say the least abysmal – who does that? 

I do not believe people change just by keeping them doing the same thing they have always been doing, so Madam will continue in the same path and we can shout and yell – hope for the best.

On the other hand, little is known of Mrs Aisha Buhari. She comes across as shy. I am not sure if this has to do with religion or her nature. Nonetheless, she has made efforts in a few public speeches that I have watched, very clear and concise – relatable even.

So in the off chance that Mrs Aisha Buhari becomes our next First Lady – lots of work ahead. If I were a First Lady of Nigeria married at 19 years old and grandma at 44 years old. Here’s what I would do. I will not waste any second of my time hunting people picking on my age of marriage because let’s face it FLON is not FL of Northern Nigeria so people in the south would pick on this fact – nothing I could do about it.

If I were Mrs Buhari, I will own up to my story and educate myself about the diversity of Nigeria people – not relying on word of mouth but get out to meet people.

What I have read about Mrs Buhari that I found incredible is the way she has improved and continuing to improve herself in all fronts (studying for MA Intern’l Affairs and Strategic Studies) – this to me is very important and reflects in the way she relates to people.

There are so many ways to make improvement and be a role model to Nigeria women, one could be starting from immediate door step – Vesico Vaginal Fistula and high divorce rate in northern NigeriaSometimes it is easier to deal with issues that one knows best. 

No one is expecting a quick fix for all of our social issues, but a role model First Lady would choose a project she is comfortable with and execute it as passionately as she could for the benefit of all.

Categories: Africa, Education, Nigeria, Women

Tags: , , , , ,

11 replies

  1. LOL>>>>> The comments are as interesting as the post.
    But I wonder…..seriously, Do you Nigerian ladies like the idea of the role of a First lady more than you dislike the idea of no serious support for a female presidential candidate nationwide?

    Please read the question well (severally) before answering!

    I already know how most Nigerian men will answer my question, so guys don’t bother being polite because the ladies are reading.

    Liked by 1 person

    • Ha, well female president will be president for all Nigerians so I suppose men’s opinions are as important as women’s in this, abi?

      We haven’t had any female candidate put forward yet…I think a female President of Nigeria would be the greatest thing we could do ever! This country would see so much transformation than any time in history – we’ve seen it done in our homes.

      Additionally, as much as it would be fantastic to have a female president, it is important not to have a puppet, aka GEJ double. The likes of Petroleum/Aviation ladies would send us a century backward. Also, we can not afford to have any lady who is unable to finish a sentence without dragging God/Allah into it or ends statement with ‘it is well’ that is Nigeria wash.

      Having said that, I believe we do have women who can do it…yes, we do LOL

      I don’t know about the role of the FL, we expected our leader to have orderly home hence the expectations of the FL to be a role model but seriously, I’d be happy to have a quiet house wife FL than having another Madam P or Stella Obasanjo any day.

      Liked by 1 person

  2. That’s why you will always be my President FK. Well said.

    Liked by 1 person

  3. Thanks for this, and I like the idea of IF …

    First, the position of “first lady” at state and “federal” levels in Nigeria, as we all know, has been much abused even though as you clearly point out here, it is not an elective position. Over the years, MOST of the women have used the position to collect money – aided by their spouses – that often become private property through so-called initiatives that are turned into personal businesses. There’s no need here to cite examples of a specific example that I had several occasions to write about in my rested weekly Nigerian essays just as there’s no need to mention a particular lady whose work for the purpose for which funds were publicly-raised was meritorious.

    I was actually surprised to see Mrs. Buhari come out the way she has because I did not think the General was going to give in to that platform; he should, IF he wins, hopefully bring sanity to what has become another big leaking outlet for public funds, including even at local government level where wives of chairmen consider themselves first ladies of sorts.

    I’m not opposed to the position of “first ladyism”, to quote the Nobel Laureate, Wole Soyinka, but in the Nigerian context, it has become burdensome for the system with – pardon me – two very powerful people from one family each at “federal”, state and local government levels costing the various tiered governments millions in maintaining the paraphernalia of offices even though half of these “rulers” are unelected.

    What Nigeria needs now is a de-emphasis of “first ladyism” even while allowing that the wives should be able to get involved – if they so choose – in drawing attention to social problems because, after all, most governments at state level and the center, do have ministries and departments that should look after these problems. Apart from ministers (“federal”) and commissioners (state) levels, huge recurrent expenditures are also expended on all sorts of assistants and advisers at both levels.

    My regards,

    Liked by 1 person

    • These are all very true with corruption via initiatives of First Lady. Not quite sure if we have had anyone in recent history that is close to being public nuisance as Madam P.

      The role of first lady is not our problem, I don’t think so. Our main problem is the role of the presidency, if we managed to get free and fair election to all our keys positions, hopefully, they will be able to sit down and read what is expected of them and act accordingly.

      As it stand today, Madam P will yell at anyone even the governors/ministers because most of these people knew exactly how they got there.

      As a friend says, we get what we deserve.

      Seeing how inspiring FL in other land works, I believe Madam P could do a lot better but someone needs to sit her down and read the constitution to her and interpret in the language she understood most – well, we have to work with what we’ve got for now.

      Liked by 1 person

  4. I think your advice to her is sound.

    I don’t see anything wrong at getting married at the age of 19.

    The problem as I see it, with Nigerians is the lack of family planning and as a result, the birth of too many children. There lies the problem…

    The education about Nigeria and meeting the people is a good idea.

    The fistula thing, to be frank I don’t see any hope of that being wiped out, I heard of that thing about 25 years ago. I thought with education, that people would recognise that sex with underage children is not good. Especially if you consider the price for one night of pleasure (for the man), the girl has a lifetime of hell. Is it really worth it? My answer is, no; but it still continues, I guess some people just will never learn. There really is no excuse to promote unnecessary suffering, if it is culture, cultures change. If it is religion, many progressive Muslims eschew such a practice. So why is it entrenched in Nigeria? Even Senators (like Sani Yerima) can loudly proclaim their right to this kind of sex, in the name of religion and everyone will cower from them as religion is ‘off-limits’.

    She should definitely make time for the Chibok parents and to help the orphans and victims of the Boko Haram insurgency. For a start give them decent accomodation. I wouldn’t be so quick to rush them back home, when the Nigerian army has not proven that is has staying power or is even professional and can be relied upon..

    That will be more than enough to keep her hands full.

    If Patience Jonathan remains in her post, well you might was well throw in the towel, like in a boxing ring… Those who are suffering will continue to do so with here in office.

    Liked by 1 person

    • Fistula issue could not be wiped out, but she can help raise more awareness on this issue. I only learn about it last year – being honest about it and lending voice on ad hoc would go a long way.

      And on family planning, she could lend voice as well and I bet she would help so many even right from her our neighbourhood.
      Mrs Buhari attitude towards the Chibok parents would interest many Nigerians. Rich women behaved exactly like Madam P did, no surprises but she can be different – humane one.


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