STI – Jungle Fever and the danger of trusting White Expats in Nigeria

If you have an Oyinbo (Caucasian) friends or colleagues working anywhere in developing world and in this case Africa you are likely to see my points here.

For a taxi/molue drivers: Obalende or FESTAC.

For Oyinbos, rich Nigerians or young male breaking into the new world married or not: Pats Bar or Why Not in Victoria Island, or The Palm in Lekki present plenty of good-looking women looking to supplement their day job with extra income.

None of these were hidden.

Adults can do whatever they so pleased with their bodies when making sure they are not danger to people around – I do think people involved in this “trade” should be well informed on how best to protect themselves against infectious diseases, the benefits is not just for themselves but for other innocent people who through no fault of their own might get caught up in the mess.

Noticing a plaster on a friend’s inner elbow I asked what the plaster was for –  he just had a blood test. So I ask, why the blood test as worried if he was ill. His response was slow to come and because he had no reason to lie “I fell off the horse” he said. Well, as we all do everyday, abi? He didn’t think it was funny because he had a week or so to wait for the result, he was worried sick that he might have contacted HIV/AIDS in his last trip to Benin/Nigeria. He had a dream the night before that he was going to die so when he woke up he realises that he was still alive and decided to think about things that could kill him in real life then he remembered his trip to Benin where he went out in the evening to a club and had unprotected sex in a country where AIDS/HIV is as real as night and day.

For a minute, I struggled to see who gets my sympathy – Jonathan, who knows better and should have acted accordingly or the ignorant Benin lady who, am told had a condom with her and wanted to use it but the Oyinbo guy was too much “in the zone” to be bothered so Christiane ignored her instinct of “safety first” and followed Jonathan’s lead because that comes with extra juicy tips. The problem here with Christiane was that she trusted that Jonathan being Oyinbo acted sensibly at all times – she was wrong. One, because Jonathan has a wife and four children in Paris, the wife that trusted her husband would never do anything that might endanger their lives, – how wrong? Two, Jon’s wife perhaps understands the lifestyle of some expats in developing countries but she is likely to trust her husband to at least use proper protection.

Where do Nigeria prostitute “joints” come in to this. Jon works for a Lagos based company, he was only in Benin for a couple of days – if you visit a new country usually one wants to see the town and all that is peculiar there,  I guess for Jon “sampling” Benin women was his tourist attraction. Over the years, I have heard a lot about prostitution in Lagos, I usually pay a bit more attention to the expats stories, when in company of friends with no judgemental hat on – they are brutally honest and you can see how desperation to wear the latest designer outfits has pushed our sisters into oblivion. And by the way,  the common excuse – they are all students and must work to pay for fees. Really? You have to have Louis Vuitton matching bag/shoes to study?

Jon’s result came out negative. I was happy for him. I am still sad that ignorance is one key problem eating us alive in Nigeria and Africa.

Here: If Christiane had tested positive, she is unlikely to survive, actually she would have spread it to enough people both Oyinbos and local men before she will stop the trade. She is likely to die shortly after for lack of access to antiretroviral drugs.

If Jon was tested positive, he has higher chance of surviving the ordeal because his government would provide the supports in terms of antiretroviral drugs and emotional needs. He is unlikely to be stigmatised.

If you were going to sell your bodies, you owe yourself and the society to do it sensibly.



Categories: Africa, Family, Nigeria

Tags: , , , , , , , , , , , , , , ,

14 replies

  1. I worked with LOTS of the Ashawo sorts in ten major cities in Nigeria, spanning 6 months, as part of an NGO project to collect data about how hygienic they are, generally. This was only late last year. We learned to our surprise that these ladies of the night are more than averagely hygienic. They’ve the fear of VD in their heads like no other group of women. The most gullible ones we discovered are those who should know better. They are the educated tertiary institution sorts who ‘offer’ or ‘sell’ or their bodies for the fun of it or to supplement income, respectively. So its no surprise to read about you Benin girl. Worrisome abi?

    Liked by 1 person

    • Thank you so much Yasniger for sharing this, very useful as I think our people / leaders should really stop kidding around and help educate the population on the prevalence of prostitution (Ashewo) in our cities.

      And you are very correct, the Benin girl wasn’t the Brothel type, she is the Uni student/Bank teller/waitress type working second job to feed the addiction of wearing the latest. They are what they are but the society has to find a way to educate them so they don’t through their ignorance infect innocent citizens.

      Liked by 1 person

  2. Powerful words – left speechless

    Liked by 1 person

  3. Powerful piece. People need to realize that such carelessness and sometimes ignorance has an effect not only on them but on other people as well.

    Liked by 1 person

  4. Okay, so let me get this straight – and trust me, I’m not the ‘moralising’ type (as you probably know) that said, both Christiane and Jonathan get no tears from me, as the U.S. Marines always say: “proper preparation prevents piss-poor performance”! and in the case mentioned, something my dear departed mom instilled in us before she sent us off to university remains true as rain (and back in the early seventies all we had to deal with was the “drips” and/or the “clap”) ‘an ounce of prevention is worth a pound of cure’ sorry, but as for sympathy for the protagonist herein; try next door, we’re all dried up here – expat or native, stupid is as stupid does –

    Liked by 1 person

    • Of course I can already tell especially when GEJ is your ‘best’ friend!

      It is stupidity, I agree. Only that for the locals, their stupidity wouldn’t harm the offenders alone, usually they end up pulling along smart people.

      Already, we have had cases of women/men getting into relationship with HIV+ and did not inform partners and eventually the other got infected. This was a few months back on the news somewhere in the Southsouth. See?

      Like

      • I see and I agree wholeheartedly (by the way, that was a low blow, regarding you know who) with you, the brazen sadness of people who feel no shame in bestowing on others (especially those to whom they have promised fidelity) death by slowness and ignorance is undeniably worthy of shaming and in fact, although usually I wouldn’t recommend it: stoning. The simple fact of the matter is this, both parties to the sexual act should come carrying, in case of rain. Pity is marriage has no guarantee of purity, nor does it warrant trust (on both sides of the bed) of straying within bounds. In Nigeria as well as here in “God’s chosen country” people have ‘lying eyes’ and ‘cheating hearts’ and are willing to take the chance it won’t happen to them . . . Oops! To be honest with you, I have no idea how the young and virile – expat Anglo and naija alike – can even fathom performing the horizontal lambada without an investment in the ‘Trojan rubber company’ when the consequences of keeping that fifty cents (no clue as to what they cost now, so bear that in mind) in pocket, versus the pain and suffering that may come afterwards can be will, death. Pity so many in your country (and indeed mine as well) consider this not. Pity still the ‘faithful’ partner who has to live with the stigma of everyone knowing.

        (Really, that was such a low blow,and it was so beneath you, my ‘best friend’ really, i’m hurt! . . . hear he’s running again by the way)

        Liked by 1 person

        • I think in my country, it is more of ignorance than anything. Actually what makes this case upsetting was the fact that the girl concerned had ‘rubber’ with her however, she was quick to throw her common sense out of the window because Oyinbo man can’t wait, likely do the same thing for local man with fat wallet as well, but taxi/molue driver will have to obliged to her rule.

          I know re your ‘best’ friend and you are right he is on for 2015 and likely to be there for another four year because he has all the celebrity religious leaders under his belt and these guys would do anything to stay on the payroll.

          Like

          • Hey now! My man Goodluck is doing alright for himself, not only has he the belief of the people (present company excluded, of course) but more importantly he has the foreign – american – media and governments backing him as well. Good man that Goodluck! As for the “working girls” what can I say, the allure of ‘easy’ money will always win out over ‘common sense’

            Liked by 1 person

  5. So many layers of irresponsibility, silliness and hypocrisy on expats’ parts – the powerful exploiting the impoverished – simply because they can. But then all aspects of sex tourism and sexual exploitation, whoever goes in for it, is dismal and destructive and ultimately dispiriting.

    Liked by 2 people

    • Thank you Trish.

      Well in this case I think responsibility lies heavily on us (Nigerian) to educate ourselves. Prostitution, though illegal is in our faces, at least one thing to do is to make sure these ladies/men get proper education that they needed so they are not risk to the society.

      For the expats, I think humans are funny, most of them are in Africa with good intention and are doing great job but because they are not monks and some didnt have their families there so danger of ‘falling off the horse’ is high. However, doing it responsibly would be fantastic. Not trying to excuse their behaviour but I think if the local people insisted on proper protection, they are mostly going to oblige.

      Liked by 1 person

  6. Now Lagosian prostitutes are agitating for legal recognition of their trade. I read it in newspaper some days back.
    This kind of write-up has been put into play by some Nigerians and Foreigners’ musicians. They named the play SHUGA. It primarily based on HIV/AIDS and it’s preventions.
    Good work to you Aunty.

    Liked by 1 person

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